Nearly a nana

Coronavirus affected us all in different ways. Although neither my husband or myself have had COVID 19,20,21 OR 22 I feel that it has still affect us. I’m willing to admit that it has had a big impact on my mental health and as a result on health. Once again I am using this blog (in some ways writing to myself which I find therapeutic and mind clearing to move forward. One impact of COVID was becoming addicted to Korean drama’s. This has expanded both our culinary and alcoholic experiences, as well as knowledge about Korean culture.

Can you truly reinvent yourself, or is it find yourself at 63. I’m hoping you can. We read about people divorcing their husbands (I don’t want to do that), studying, running away from the world (yes I could do that)

I find the part being still not knowing who I am. When I read back on my past post, I am still no closer to knowing how to spend the rest of my life.

Yoga, that was my solace and meditation that I felt helped my mental health I’ve abandoned. How do I find my way back. I need to be kind to myself and take babysteps.

Who am I, to me, my friends and my family. Let the journey begin.

I haven’t started up my yoga again. I am hoping by typing this to keep myself accountable. Today I started making masks for my family and a couple of friends. I had made prototypes to test sizes, but was daunted by the number, -40. Basically 1/2 done in doing each stage together.

I have been meditating each night for the last 7 days and feel this is making an impact on my attitude and capacity to get things done, instead of procrastinating.

We were just watching The Drum tonight, and remembered fondly of lots of the positive aspects of the first lockdown. People making the most of it, by doing different things and putting up videos that made us smile. Luckily we are not in Melbourne, but still trying to stay home as much as possible.

My grandson is now 4 1/2, I’m retired, and have two other beautiful boys in my life. I started this blog when I was becoming a grandmother for the first time to keep my accountable to being the best person I could be including the healthiest. I have had such an erratic start to this in the last 4 1/2 years. In fact I haven’t posted for the last three years. The Coronavirus that has hit the world has obliterated the last 6 months. I should have had the time to really focus on yoga and exercise as well as diet. That hasn’t happened if not the reverse has happened. Not exercising, or really worrying about what we are eating. The one positive is that I haven’t actually used alcohol as a crutch.

Accountabilities for this week.

Continue to meditate.

Start a daily yoga practice (yet again).

In my quest to be the best person I can be including healthiest, I have been seeing a herbalist, using crystals, reflexology and massage, Bach Australian essences and essential oils  It is amazing how much this seems to work. My journey with the herbalist is now 6 months on and I am starting to feel human again, but it is a two steps forward, one back at times. When I first visited the herbalist she conducted iridology, live and dry blood testing, as well as toxicity. Over the 6 months, I have lost 5 1/2 kgs without really trying, really not changing anything except eating more greens and less carbohydrates. Most other areas are improving, the one aspect that is not is my hydration levels, even though I am focussing on increasing my water intake and feel that I am drinking about 2 litres a day. I will need look for ways to increase my hydration. My “foot fairy” (reflexologist) always says to me that I’m dehydrated but I couldn’t understand why as I was alway drinking the right amount. I am finding congruence between all these alternative health practitioners as my foot fairy says I’m dehydrated, so does the herbalist, but then my body through my cankles shows I’m dehydrated as does my blood. There must be some truth in it.

Today I am grateful for the blessed life I have lived, yes I’ve had my ups and downs, but have had a happy, “privileged” life.

My Doeterra oil for the day is Balance and my crystal is Bloodstone.

 

Why Balance it is a grounding oil that gives a sense of calm. I love how the oils make me feel.

 

Over the last 6 months I have been visiting a naturopath to deal with the minor health issues I’ve had, namely exhaustion and just a sense of not feeling that I am working at my best.  Over the 6 months I have dropped over 5 kilos even though we have only just got through the holiday period, and lost body fat. Overall the only area of my health that has dramatically improved is my hydration. Note to self to increase the amount of water I drink, which I thought I was really focussing on and increasing the intake but obviously not succeeding in.  My journey of nourishing myself today will be to look at complementary ways of increasing hydration as well as having the desired effect on my body and health.

My quote of the day belatedly; Louise Hay’s thought for Sunday 7th January

My thoughts are creative. I constantly have new insights and new ways of looking at the world.

I am grateful for the people in my life that nourish me emotionally, healthily and wholistically.

At most transition points in your life you reflect on who you are. Today while I was killing time as well as trying to have some me time, i was walking around the local shopping centre. I love to people watch and today more so looked at people with the question of who do I portray myself as. I have such an ecclectic style I think, but I don’t think it really reflects who I am. Which brings me to the question Who am I? I really don’t think I know who I am any more, it is more like just absently trying to find my niche. This will be an area of  my journey for nourishing my soul.  Who am I and  what is my place in the world. More to come.

 

I am grateful for my family and friends and the time we share together.

They say that you seem to take more notice of the things that your grandchildren do than you did when you had your own children. I am finding this is the case, I also think it is also you don’t put the time pressure on yourself. Two years old is such a beautiful age, yes we see elements of the terrible twos, but the developmental growth is amazing. Today his parents dropped him off and we were talking to them and then next thing he’s standing there folding his arms just like his poppy. A little while later I was standing leaning on the door frame, look over and here he is leaning on the other door frame, as we mentioned this he had a smirk on his face to say that he knew what he was doing. It is an absolute delight to spend time with them and do special things.

I am grateful for my grandson and soon to be grandtwins.

I am loving having the time to actually read the posts of people I am following on FB. I have been following Buddhist Bootcamp for  a couple of years now and have never done anything other than skim read it.  I actually like the idea of simplifying my life and dream of doing this. Today I actually read his blog and it made sense to me how I will be able to nourish my soul.  It was about celebrating small victories. I am extremely fortunate, I woke up, I have a roof over my head, food to nourish me and clothes to ear. To nourish my soul I will focus on what I have to be grateful for and in the past have done a gratitude journal have not consistently done this.  This is a habit that I know will make a big difference in my life.

I am grateful for the clean air I breath, the roof over my head, the food I cook and eat, and time.

My word for 2018 is Nourish, nourish my creativity, my soul, my body and my mind. This year is about looking after myself first so that I can be the best person for my family and friends.  I haven’t made any New Year resolutions just hoping this word will be my mantra. In deciding of the word for the year, the first thing I thought of was creativity. I have long thought that I don’t have a creative bone in my body, but just before Christmas I had an urge to draw, something I haven’t done since I was a child. For the first time I felt proud of what I was able to achieve, hence a major focus will be in developing my creative side. I have been reading and researching nourishing my body for a while, and am feeling that I am able to do this, now I have the time during the holidays to cook real, whole food, and majority of vegetables. My exercise regime is starting slowly but feel that all this together will have a major change on my physical being. My mind I actively engage everyday. The question is how will I nourish my soul, what does this mean. It will be part of my journey for this year.